The Elderly...My What a Bastardly Bunch They Are

I cannot stress this enough: Walk with a purpose or get the hell out of my way. I don't think that any one of us feels that when they get old they will be like the old people who piss us off now, but we will be. I know what you're thinking. Trust me. "I'm not going to be an old fart/biddy!" Yes, you are. You'll be that old man that you want to push down the stairs. That old fart that says the rudest shit to young girls because he knows that no one's going to say anything to you about it. That little old cotton candy haired lady who holds up the line for an hour because she has a fucking coupon for every last item in the cart and by fucking god they better ring the fuck up right or else there'll be hell to pay! Do you hear me?!! HELL TO PAY!!! We are all headed down that road. We have all booked passage on the SS Geritol and there's no way to stop it. Remember that The Who once said "I hope I die before I get old" and now they are. Well, old or dead. Way to go Keith Moon! You did it! Dead before old. I'm thinking that the only real way to beat it is by the intake of massive amounts of illegal drugs and equal amounts of perfectly legal alcohol. It couldn't hurt.