Bootleg PBS

That's right, bootleg PBS. Just cos I'm that hardcore. I'm watchin burned DVDs of Charlie Rose interviewing Al Gore. Old episodes of the Jim Lehrer Newshour hosted by Ray Suarez. If you can't hang with that go back to eating grapes in the supermarket aisles. I'm flippin past discs of Frontline to get to Ken Burns' Civil War. You want vintage 3-2-1 Contact? How bout some Reading Rainbow? Hey what punkass stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Me, muddafugga. Couldn't be, you say? Then who? Sure as hell wasn't that beeyotch Boot. I left him tied up James Bond style to be swallowed by a boa constrictor. That's how I roll. It's all made possible by annual financial support from suckas like you. Thank you.